I was away in California at a worship seminar as the words of Christa Black echoed in my mind. She explained how our bodies react to the words we speak over them and how most inner and outer diseases are a result of negative words that have been spoken over ourselves over time.
I never realized how much damage I had done to myself, until I understood that. Like most of us women, there’s always SOMETHING we want to change. For some it’s just hair color or wardrobe, but for me it was much deeper than that. I hated what I saw. I was embarrassed. I felt like as the days went by, the more [they] covered my body. I thought about the ugly scars they would leave behind and the judgmental comments I would hear. All I knew was; I hated my skin and I wanted it to go away! I just couldn't understand why this was happening to me. So what? I had "sensitive skin." But I never expected the diagnoses to be "Pityriasis Rosea (PR)". I know, how do you even pronounce that?
Well, the internet likes to call it a disease. I like to call it a temporary skin invasion from the pit of hell. I did my research, and according to studies they don’t know the causes of “PR”. It’s not contagious but it’s ugly, itchy and traumatizing. They say that those who get PR USUALLY don't get it ever again. Unfortunately for me, I got it three times in a matter of 2 years. That's when I knew it was something more than just a reaction from my immune system. Something was wrong and something had to change.
As I sat in Bethel’s temple next to my good friend, I couldn’t find the words to explain to her what I was feeling. It was more than just a revelation from God, but I had just realized how little I loved myself. That moment took me back to so many times when I “jokingly” said, “I hate my skin, I hate my hair, I’m so fat, I’m so this, I’m so that.” Not only did I constantly say these horrible things about myself, but I found myself rejecting people’s compliments towards me. Not because I didn’t like compliments, but because I didn’t believe those things were true about me.
They later showed us a video of a little girl (which you can see above) who stood in front of her mirror, speaking positive words to herself. I couldn’t believe that a little 4 year old girl knew who she was and loved what she saw when she looked in the mirror. And there I was…with patches all over my body and no idea of what it meant to TRULY love myself. The point is, loving yourself is essential. I can honestly say that when I stopped speaking negative words over my life, everything changed. Even the scars I thought PR would leave behind vanished. Most importantly I learned that there is power in the words we speak. That I am a reflection of God’s image, therefore I was speaking negatively about HIS creation.
I learned that He made me different, but beautiful, and that I need to love myself in order to love someone else. Know that you are beautiful and that there is nothing you need to change about yourself. Wake up every day, look in the mirror and speak words of affirmation to yourself. Be content with who you are and what you see, because being yourself is what makes you different. [Things] change when YOU change the way you think and change the words that you speak.
Try it and trust me, it will change e v e r y t h I n g.
GOD IS LOVE – be beyond blessed <3
